Do I Live Happily Ever After?

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Do I Live Happily Ever After?

Do I Live Happily Ever After?

I have always loved a happy ending. Growing up, I loved the Disney movies with the princesses who found their prince and lived happily ever after.

Who doesn’t want to “live happily ever after?”

But what does “happily ever after” mean? When is the after? To what point? The whole time? For the rest of their lives?

Dictionary.com defines it to “spend the rest of one’s life in happiness.”

Did Steve live “happily ever after?” Was he happy during his life? Yes. He was very happy. Were there bad times, sad times, stressed out times, and difficult times? Yes. Those too. But that’s normal.

The Urban Dictionary defines it as “to find your one and only and live happily with them for the rest of your life. To be constantly happy with no end.”

So, according to this definition did Steve live happily ever after? The first part yes. He found his one and only – me – and lived happily with me for the rest of his life.

But was he constantly happy with no end? No, that’s impossible. It’s not realistic for anyone. There are going to be crappy times. You are going to have bad moods. There are going to be really sad things that happen. It can’t be avoided. But can we live happily every after anyway?

What about me? Do I live “happily ever after?”

I found my one and only and lived happily with him but now he’s gone. But he will stay with me, in my heart and I will live happily ever after with him there.

To live happily ever after is a choice.

Am I heartbroken still? Yes. But I could choose to be unhappy all the time, but that wouldn’t honour him or be much fun at all.

In so many of the Disney movies, the princesses are orphans or have lost a parent. I suppose my girls are those princesses. They’ve been dealt a bad hand but they deserve to live happily ever after too.

Will I be “constantly happy with no end?” Nope. None of us will. There will be ups and downs, good times and bad times. Happiness will have endings and beginnings again.

To live happily every after is too long of a concept anyway. I can only focus on now and a short time from now. It’s all I can handle. For now, I choose to live happily in the moments that feel right and feel the all the other emotions in the moments that feel right for those. That’s all we can do.

Honour how you feel each moment and know that it’s ok but don’t stay in the darkness. You deserve to live happily ever after too, whatever that looks like for you.

Love and hugs

Whitney

 

 

 

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9 Choices of Extremely Happy People

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IMG_1791I’ve been receiving The Eco Parent magazine which is a fabulous magazines and I highly recommend subscriptions to it. I pulled out an article about “sustainable happiness”  a few months ago and it has been sitting on my desk. I love each point and I think it’s a worthwhile list to revisit every couple of months to make sure you are on your own path to your unique happiness.

Here is how we choose to be happy: The 9 choices of extremely happy people  – by Rick Foster & Greg Hicks. Putnam, New York: 1999.

  1. Intention. The active desire and commitment to be happy, and the fully conscious decision to choose happiness over unhappiness.
  2. Accountability. The choice to create the life you want to live; to assume full personal responsibility for your actions, thoughts, and feelings, and the emphatic refusal to blame others for your unhappiness.
  3. Identification. The ongoing process of looking deeply within yourself to assess what makes you uniquely happy, apart from what you’re told by others should make you happy.
  4. Centrality. The non-negotiable insistence on making that which creates happiness central in your life.
  5. Recasting. The choice to convert problems into opportunities and challenges, and to transform trauma into something meaningful, important, and a source of emotional energy.
  6. Options. The decision to approach life by creating multiple scenarios; to be open to new possibilities and to adopt a flexible approach to life’s journey.
  7. Appreciation. The choice to appreciate deeply your life and the people in it, and to stay in the present by turning each experience into something precious.
  8. Giving. The choice to share yourself with friends and community and to give to the world at large without the expectation of a “return.”
  9. Truthfulness. The choice to be honest with yourself and others in an accountable manner by not allowing societal, corporate, or family demands to violate your internal contract.

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