Ditch the Mom Guilt

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Today I sat at the park and journaled while the kids played. ⁠
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I ditched the “should.” ⁠
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I “should” go over there and play with them or push them on the swing. I “should” be a more involved mom. I “should” be more engaged. ⁠
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But who’s voice was I hearing? ⁠
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Where did this come from?⁠
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Why couldn’t they be kids, while I be a mom sitting at the park? ⁠
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We give ourselves so much mom guilt, it’s ridiculous!⁠
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Just enjoy the freaking park. Go sit on a bench, or grass, or bring your own chair and relax.⁠
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Ok, maybe some of you aren’t there yet. Your kids actually need you to make sure they don’t fall of the equipment and hurt themselves. ⁠
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But where else in your life do you use so many “shoulds?”⁠
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Where else in your life do you pile on the “mom guilt?”

Come hang out with my in my Facebook Group for moms and let’s chat together about it there.

Talk soon,

Whitney

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Mommy Moods & Kids Long-Term Health

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1 in 5 people will experience mental illness in any given year in Canada. This is truly an epidemic. It doesn’t only affect the person, their jobs, their health, it affects the people around them.

Sadly, it has a long-term negative effect on children. The ACEs study of Adverse Childhood Experiences found that children who grew up with the experience of a depressed family member in the household had an increased chance of long-term health consequences like chronic disease, mental illness, substance abuse and early death.

This is not great news. This is why it’s so important to address mom’s health when we’re talking about children’s health. They are part of the family unit. Everyone in the family affects the other.

This is why I’m passionate about working with moms.

Watch my short video about this and a small thing you can do TODAY to help both mom and child.

Talk soon,

Whitney

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Supermoms Throw Out the Rules

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The biggest lesson I’m learning as a mom is to let go of the strict rules and how I “should” parent, or should do this or that.

I’d ask everyone for feedback. What do you do? How do YOU handle this situation with your kids. What SHOULD I do about bedtimes, sleep routines, their diet, their grieving, their extracurricular activities.

We have so many decisions to make as parents and we put so much pressure on ourselves to “do it right.”

But what is right? Who says there is only 1 right way to raise a child? Who says there is only 1 right way or path for a child to be happy, healthy & hearty so they can ultimately be OK?

There isn’t any 1 path. It doesn’t exist. If someone tells you it does, then they are lying to themselves.

Each child is unique, each child has their own temperament they were born with. Each child responds differently to different things. Maybe your child is great at sports, maybe they like quiet artwork activities. Knowing our children is one of the keys to happiness as a mother. Not trying to fit them into the prescribed box of a “perfect child.”

Allowing them to be free, allows us to be free. Then we don’t have to follow any rules. We get to make up the rules!! How amazing is that?!?

Whitney

Want to be a better mom? Get the Supermom Survival Guide here. 

 

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Trust Your Mommy Gut

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Your Mommy Gut. The little voice inside you or pit in your stomach that whispers, I want to do things differently.

Have you ever had that feeling? Where you just didn’t think something was right? Or something wasn’t right for you?

The thing is, there are a million different parenting decisions we make every week… what to feed them, how to react or not react to their behaviour, what time to put them to bed, how to respond to their cough or cold or fever. The list goes on.

It’s a hard job making all of those decisions!

And sometimes you want to do things differently than everyone else.

And you know what? That’s ok.

Your superpower is your Mommy Gut. Your intuition that tells you “You know what? This is what feels right for me. This is what feels right for our family.”

Sometimes you will ask for others opinions or advice. Sometimes you will take it and sometimes you won’t. But what I want you to do this week is sit quietly with yourself and the decisions weighing on your mind.

What DO YOU want to do? How DO YOU want to react? What FEELS RIGHT to YOU?

Trust your Mommy Gut. It’s there for a reason.

You’re doing a great job.

And if you want to ask for a little help or a little non-judgmental advice. I’m here for you

Whitney

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The Perils of Parenting

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Last night I was running down the stairs into the basement and stepped straight onto an upturned, jewelled tiara. 5 perfect puncture wounds appeared on the bottom of my foot.

I could have yelled. I could have demanded the girls tell me which one did it. Who left that on the stairs?! For me to step on?! And then bleed?!

They were already pretty horrified by my cry out in pain. The sight of the blood also really made them worried.

I took it as a teachable moment. Calmly explaining that this was a great reason why we shouldn’t leave our toys on the floor.

Am I the most patient mother in the world? Probably not. But I do know that there are many things that I do to make sure I’m in a better mood when I’m around the kids so I don’t lose my cool as often as I used to.

Here’s what I do to make sure I’m a calmer mom:

  • Get a good night sleep
  • Eat regularly (no hangry allowed!)
  • Take time away from the kids aka “me time”
  • Make my life enjoyable and not totally revolving around them
  • Counselling and coaching so I can know my feelings and reactions better

I love working with other moms who want to be Supermoms for their Superkids.

If you’d love to feel more in control of your emotions and your health, book in for a free intro session to chat more about how we could work together.

You’ve got this, Mama.

Talk soon,

Whitney

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9 Choices of Extremely Happy People

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IMG_1791I’ve been receiving The Eco Parent magazine which is a fabulous magazines and I highly recommend subscriptions to it. I pulled out an article about “sustainable happiness”  a few months ago and it has been sitting on my desk. I love each point and I think it’s a worthwhile list to revisit every couple of months to make sure you are on your own path to your unique happiness.

Here is how we choose to be happy: The 9 choices of extremely happy people  – by Rick Foster & Greg Hicks. Putnam, New York: 1999.

  1. Intention. The active desire and commitment to be happy, and the fully conscious decision to choose happiness over unhappiness.
  2. Accountability. The choice to create the life you want to live; to assume full personal responsibility for your actions, thoughts, and feelings, and the emphatic refusal to blame others for your unhappiness.
  3. Identification. The ongoing process of looking deeply within yourself to assess what makes you uniquely happy, apart from what you’re told by others should make you happy.
  4. Centrality. The non-negotiable insistence on making that which creates happiness central in your life.
  5. Recasting. The choice to convert problems into opportunities and challenges, and to transform trauma into something meaningful, important, and a source of emotional energy.
  6. Options. The decision to approach life by creating multiple scenarios; to be open to new possibilities and to adopt a flexible approach to life’s journey.
  7. Appreciation. The choice to appreciate deeply your life and the people in it, and to stay in the present by turning each experience into something precious.
  8. Giving. The choice to share yourself with friends and community and to give to the world at large without the expectation of a “return.”
  9. Truthfulness. The choice to be honest with yourself and others in an accountable manner by not allowing societal, corporate, or family demands to violate your internal contract.

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