The Map of Our Lives Keeps Changing

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The rules keep changing. We get our footing and then it’s pulled out from under us again.

Of course you’re upset. Of course you’re unmotivated. Of course you’re more irritable than you “should” be.

This is hard. You’re grieving. You’re lonely. You’re missing connection. You’re missing people. You’re missing physical touch.

And you’re not sure when it’s going to end. When you’ll feel better. When you’ll wake up from this dream (or nightmare).

The thing is, we don’t have control.

This pandemic has taught us so many things. One of the big ones is that the stability, predictability and safety we all lived in was not as it seemed.

You get it now. If you didn’t already.

Life can change in an instant.

A quote on a greeting card that sits on my bookshelf says “we cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.”

We’ve been on a long sail boat voyage we didn’t sign up for.

We didn’t pack appropriately for it. We didn’t get to take a class or two on sailing. We’ve been sailing for over a year now in a direction that we think is the right one. We’ve been constantly adjusting our sails and going with the flow.

We don’t know what the new land will look like when we get there.

We really know our shipmates though. We’ve spent A LOT of time with them!

It’s not always smooth sailing. You know this. I know this.

But on the sunny days, we feel better. We can look around and appreciate our shipmates and our sturdy vessel.

Adjust your sails.

What can make today a better day for you? How can you add joy? What can you ACTUALLY control? Do those things. Don’t wait.

I’m finally going to sign up for one of those Zoom painting classes or something. I’m organizing my storage closet. Some days I don’t feel like doing anything. I honour those days. Then when my motivation comes back, I ride that wave.

You’re not alone. We can do this.

Adjust your sails.

 

Whitney

 

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Ditch the Mom Guilt

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Today I sat at the park and journaled while the kids played. ⁠
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I ditched the “should.” ⁠
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I “should” go over there and play with them or push them on the swing. I “should” be a more involved mom. I “should” be more engaged. ⁠
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But who’s voice was I hearing? ⁠
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Where did this come from?⁠
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Why couldn’t they be kids, while I be a mom sitting at the park? ⁠
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We give ourselves so much mom guilt, it’s ridiculous!⁠
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Just enjoy the freaking park. Go sit on a bench, or grass, or bring your own chair and relax.⁠
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Ok, maybe some of you aren’t there yet. Your kids actually need you to make sure they don’t fall of the equipment and hurt themselves. ⁠
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But where else in your life do you use so many “shoulds?”⁠
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Where else in your life do you pile on the “mom guilt?”

Come hang out with my in my Facebook Group for moms and let’s chat together about it there.

Talk soon,

Whitney

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Isolated Monster Mom

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It’s here, my newest guide for you.

We’ve been living in unprecedented times. I’m so sick of that phrase! But, it’s true.

We’ve been doing the mom thing during a pandemic, and we’ve never had to do that before.

You’ve been feeling crappy and losing your cool a lot more often than before.

I’ve compiled the 3 REAL reasons this is going on.

Click here to get access to this list and the 9 things you can do RIGHT NOW to start feeling saner.

I’m here for you,

Whitney

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I miss hugs

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Human Touch.⁠⁠

I remember when I was newly widowed. That first year I was lucky to have such amazing support from my family and close friends. ⁠⁠I got hugs and cuddles daily from my toddler and newborn. But obviously something was missing. ⁠⁠

I remember going to see my osteopath and getting a treatment. He put his arms around me like a hug in some of the gentle adjustments. I wasn’t attracted to him, don’t misunderstand this, but the human touch filled a void that I didn’t know I was missing so much. ⁠⁠

Now, in this pandemic where we aren’t allowed to hug our closest friends, our family members, the new babies in our outer circles… it’s going against the human need for connection and touch. ⁠⁠

Of course it’s important to do our due diligence and protect the vulnerable people in our lives. Of course we are going to do what the medical professionals and our leaders are suggesting. ⁠⁠I’m just saying, if you are missing human connection and touch, you’re not alone.

Maybe going for that massage or osteopathic treatment is not frivolous. Maybe it’s feeding your soul, your humanness. Maybe it’s releasing wonderful hormones in your body to make you feel a little bit better. ⁠⁠

How can you get touch? Who in your social circle can you hug a little bit more?

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My Word of the Year

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Happy New Year Mama!

New Year’s is always like a fresh start. It’s like a brand new beginning. Where things can be a bit different and you can be a better mom and do things a little bit differently. It gives us a little bit of motivation to try new things, new recipes, new ways of thinking.

Every year I contemplate my intentions for the coming year and I like to pick a word that will encompass or guide my year. Last year my word was faith.

Last year my word was Faith

Faith in myself, faith in my decisions and faith in the future that I was building. Faith that everything was going to work out just as it should. Sometimes the faith wasn’t there or shaky. But I could always return to that word and feel it again.

Have you thought of yours yet? 

For me, how I found it was just thinking about this coming year of 2020. What my vision for it is. How I want to feel. What I hope to accomplish at home, with the kids, at work. I journaled and brainstormed then saw how each word on the page felt for me. 

My word will help guide me over the next year. I can use it to ask myself questions to make sure I’m on the right track. It can help remind me of the core of what I need this year. 

This year my word is Ignite. 

Ignite

I’m ready to ignite my world with more passion, love and fun. To brighten up my family life. To turn mundane into magical. To ignite those around me to feel inspired and hopeful. To ignite the ideas and dreams within me to the surface to burn brightly. To help others ignite the dreams and passions within themselves. So we can all live a life filled with passion and purpose. 

I’d love to know your word if you feel like sharing and why you chose it. 

Whitney

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Mommy Moods & Kids Long-Term Health

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1 in 5 people will experience mental illness in any given year in Canada. This is truly an epidemic. It doesn’t only affect the person, their jobs, their health, it affects the people around them.

Sadly, it has a long-term negative effect on children. The ACEs study of Adverse Childhood Experiences found that children who grew up with the experience of a depressed family member in the household had an increased chance of long-term health consequences like chronic disease, mental illness, substance abuse and early death.

This is not great news. This is why it’s so important to address mom’s health when we’re talking about children’s health. They are part of the family unit. Everyone in the family affects the other.

This is why I’m passionate about working with moms.

Watch my short video about this and a small thing you can do TODAY to help both mom and child.

Talk soon,

Whitney

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