Ok, your first step is to actually park your car. I’ve mislead you a bit with my subtitle. It’s true, I have driven while crying, that’s not unheard of. But let’s be clear, I’d really like you to pull over and then cry.
I’ll get to my 3 steps shortly.
I’m not opposed to showing my feelings, however, the thing I’ve noticed about myself is that when I’m with my kids, I’m in “Mom-Mode” and apparently “Mom-Mode” doesn’t have a Cry Function Button.
I get busy with all the mommying I need to do – wiping faces, bums, feeding them, cleaning up after them – that there doesn’t leave much time for crying or processing my emotions.
The kids actually saved me when Steve, my husband of only 4 years, died suddenly over 2.5 years ago. The kids gave me my smiles. They gave me a reason to go on, to get up out of bed. I had to do it for them. And I had to do it for him. I was a solo parent now. And I promised him I would take care of the girls. But they never saw me cry.
I quickly found that the solitude of my minivan was where I felt comfortable enough to cry. All alone, windows up, parked.
It’s really important fo you to let your emotions out. We bottle them up and then let them rip on people we love or they turn into chronic stress which leads to or worsens a whole host of chronic diseases.
So here are your steps to Car Crying. (Take it from the expert)
- Park your car – the first reason is for your safety. If you are balling your face off then you can’t really focus on the road. My favourite spots were facing fences, backs of stores or in the driveway where passersby couldn’t really see. And if they did, who cares!?
- Pick a time – it’s best to do your car crying at the end of your day or when you’ve got time to mop up afterwards. Some people it’s obvious that they’ve been crying. My sister has always been jealous of me that I don’t really look like a hot mess after crying. (Sorry sis! I don’t know what to tell you.) And if people see you’ve been crying, who cares?! It’s healthy to let out your emotions. Please refer them to this blog 😉
- Pick your tunes – create your “Songs to Cry to” playlist. When my emotions get pent up and I know they are going to explode, I just put on my playlist and it’s much easier to let them go. Some of the real kickers are “To where you are” by Josh Grobin and “See you again” by Carrie Underwood. Also thrown in there is our wedding song.
I feel so much better after a good cry. Sometimes my emotions can be stirring and under the surface for a week and they just need to get out. And then I feel better. Give it a try. This doc recommends it.
If you can’t stop crying… ever… or if it’s really bad during your PMS time and not getting any better, come see me. Book a free 15 meet the doctor and let’s chat about how to get you feeling more like yourself.
Talk soon,
Dr. Whitney